Plain Talk and Ordinary Wisdom

We all have people in our lives that we love and love us. Do you ever stop to think if there are conditions of love that you have placed on the ones you love or vice versa? In turn, are there conditions we have to meet before we are loved by those in our lives we want to love us? I think we put these conditions in place automatically without giving it much thought. It’s not something we consciously realize that we even do. In fact, I would be willing to bet without knowing it you may have put your own conditions on love. It’s so subtle that it’s hardly noticeable except to the person you love.

Relationships, for example, are supposed to be partnerships. But how many times do we point the finger at our partner blaming him/her for not following through on their part – or disappointing us in some way? When things aren’t going the way we want them to our loved ones seem to be the first to catch it all. I’m reminded of something the famous singer, James Taylor, said in an interview last weekend on a program called Sunday Morning. He said, “Unconditional love can melt the hardest rock.” I never heard it put quite that way but in just a few words he captured it perfectly having had some rocky relationships himself and problems with substance abuse. All the times that it may have been pointed out to him, “How he was ruining his life”, or “How he was going to lose everything if he didn’t straighten out”, didn’t seem to work - except unconditional love. Our hearts are hard when we know we’re messing up and we’re not doing all of what we’re supposed to be doing. We don’t want anyone pointing it out to us. We wouldn’t hear it. We only hear the tapes going on in our heads all the time, anyway.

So, how does someone love unconditionally? How do you love this way without being brought down or sometimes physically hurt in the process? When you accept their behavior are you enabling them to continue on the same path? This is a conundrum to me. I don’t know the best course of action to take and still love unconditionally. When you have a pet, that animal loves you unconditionally and accepts you no matter what mood you’re in. They’ll leave you alone if they sense they could be in danger and keep loving you from a distance. I don’t think it’s on the same level as with humans because of our thought processes but on a simpler level there’s something to be learned.

The conclusion I’ve made is that I believe unconditional love only works with the guidance and insight from God - your Source, Higher Power - whatever label you place on it. When you seek to follow that guidance and listen to your heart, you’ll be shown how to give that unconditional love no matter who you choose to love or what the situation and your ego won’t be involved. Each individual and situation is unique and no one person knows what is going on in a person’s heart and mind and we have to trust on spiritual guidance. No two situations appearing alike can be treated the same.

When I was meditating earlier today, I was able to feel unconditional love. It was gentle and sweet, safe and all encompassing. Have you felt that in your quiet moments of meditation or prayer – or just quiet moments? There’s a presence that knows you from the core of your being and lovingly accepts YOU without recourse. It feels so inviting – so good! You’re accepted totally for who you are not what you’ve done. You may not be receiving what you want in life because what you believe and act on is keeping you from what you want but through it all – you’re loved – bottom line. What you’re wanting is not being withheld from you because you’re not living up to some expectation. We block these gifts and blessings ourselves. This presence only knows who you truly are and your potential and only wants good things for us – loving us unconditionally.

How about loving like that? It’s not as simple as I’ve presented it here; in fact, more could be written, in volumes, and probably has. What are your thoughts today on unconditional love and how have you experienced it and given it?

From the kitchen table - Pat
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