Here it is barely one week into a new year and I’m needing a sign or clue from the universe as to what to do next. You’ve been there – haven’t you? I’ve done everything I know to do – apply online for jobs (back into the corporate world again? – ugh), write my posts, tweak my blog, write and rewrite my goals, write down and visualize my life in 5 years, meditate, affirm, pray, ask, seek, knock. Still nothing has been showing up – silence. Monthly bills rolling around and coming due again – does panic set in? I can’t go down that road even if all the bells and whistles are going off.
Too many times throughout my life have I been reminded that there’s an intelligence out there that knows who I am, where I’m at and what I need - more than I do. When I choose to put my attention on what good has happened in my life, what doors have been opened in the past, the opportunities that have come my way all at the perfect time, I begin to calm down and feel that peace again. It’s another reminder, another lesson to trust (see a previous post I’ve written Trust – Cutting the Rope and Taking the Leap).
One of those times I’m reminded of was back in 1985 when God answered in a tender and supernatural way. My mother had just died suddenly in her sleep and my father, naturally, was distraught and lost. It was late at night when I flew into Philadelphia from Denver and my sister picked me up to go right over to the house to help Dad. When we got there, every light in the house was on which was unusual for my parents - always keeping a low profile. I never saw my Dad in this condition. He was always so controlled with his emotions. He was worried and didn’t know what to do as Mom always handled the money – every penny. Now, the funeral home was needing a decision on how to prepare her remains and it came with a cost - $600. They had no funeral preparations, no will – hell, they never had a checking or savings account. They had lived in the Depression era and paid for everything by cash or money order. Dad couldn’t find her wallet for her identification and money. He looked everywhere in the house and came up empty and was drained not only from grief but worry of what to do. We calmed him down and my sister and I started looking. I found my mother’s wallet in the back bedroom at arm’s length between the mattresses. Next, as we looked further, we found three $100 bills in between the Sunday paper coupons on the bedroom dresser. All in all, we came up with the exact amount that was needed to put our mother to rest. It was an emotional time and a blessed time to witness first-hand the miracles that transpired those few days.
Reminders are all around us to not give up. As I wrote in an earlier post, Happy New Year!,I felt a definite shift when the clock stroked midnight and the old year diminished. When I’m tempted to look at what appears to not be happening, I’m encouraged to say like Patricia Singleton in her posting, This Is The Year That My Dreams Come True!, “It’s a reality I choose to create”. I know there’s an invisible, sweet and loving force that is ALL and knows ALL and I choose to turn my sites on that and trust. It’s there for you too; you just have to look for it. It has never left.
From the kitchen table - Pat
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Monday, January 7, 2008
My Time to Trust – Again!
Posted by Pat at 6:53 PM
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